“So, just write?”
That was my response to my spirit as I sat and meditated about 40 minutes ago. I had been begging for spirit to talk to me. “Just tell me what to do next,” was my persistent thought. My dilemma between knowing that I need money to survive and knowing that spirit will take care of me was creating a “stuck” energy that I couldn’t seem to get out of mentally. I know about faith without works and after a homeless 2020 I was not trying to revisit that experience. I went back to my grandparents’ home this past week and was able to ground. To pause. To go back to my beginnings. I’m back in my own space now, thankfully. I loved my experience at my grandparents’, but my own space is imperative for my well-being. My favorite thing to do is to sit and meditate in me bed, with the sun pouring in. I feel like it’s just me and God, communing with one another. Which leads me back to the question at the present moment. My cards speak of nothing but good fortune and abundance. My present moment however, I am without a concrete job and living on a limited and fixed income. Everything about my current circumstances is telling me to panic. To search for solutions, answers, a sign. I starting demanding answers, “Hurry Lord. Tell me what my gift is now so I can use it and start making money by it. If you tell me what to do, I can get started. I feel I have so many interests, but what makes me come alive?” Something popped up during this silent time with my loud thoughts. When I was asking myself what I do best, my thought said, “Connecting with people. Just being is something I love to do.” When I truly connect with people the exchange is always powerful. I’ve come to realize that I am a light—when properly nourished. The next thing my inner self said was to “Just be. Don’t worry about a purpose. Just keep doing your best. Continue to meet people. Continue sowing into yourself. This is the path. You will be taken care of. Just pick up your pen and journal everyday. The only difference is that now, you’ll share your thoughts with people versus keeping it to yourself because you have truly stepped into your power. You will walk and speak with authority because everything that you have gone through up until this very moment has equipped you to be able to speak up.”
“So just write?” It seemed so simple. Everything in my nature wants to complicate it. Relinquishing control, an inner struggle. But imma step out of the Universe’s way. I’ll keep you all posted on what happens next…
Nashema's Blog 