I wanna thank the beautiful souls at Enchanted Hive that poured into me the other day (I’ll write a post about my full experience soon). I came into their space in pieces and they took me and embraced me. We talked. I cried— a lot. We went outside. They knew exactly what I needed. They called me out. They made me confront hard truths. They gave me tools, homework and love and sent me on my way. I went home exhausted after all of that releasing and I’m still not done. We don’t understand the traumas that we’ve been through and continue to go through if we don’t know they were traumas to begin with. People who love you who may say something and make you feel like being your authentic self isn’t enough. Favoritism and subtle gestures that seem harmless but internalized are toxic. I thought I had healed from many things in my past. And I thought that certain things that have happened didn’t really bother me. Just because you don’t think something is harmful doesn’t mean that it isn’t. You’ve just learned how to “deal” with it. For me, I buried it and moved on and thought that was strength. Until now when I have to uncover why I don’t speak up. It’s because I found speaking up to have negative consequences. When you’re in spaces where your authenticity is shunned you learn to just keep it to yourself, because like one family member told me, “Not everyone wants to hear your opinion and what you have to say.” Lol.
I’m unlearning so much. I’m grateful that I listened to my inner guides and went into their store the other day. Y’all go check them out if you’re in Charlotte! The energy is beautiful.
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