Being at this job pushed me to free myself. To know that I was already free and that I have always had gifts. I sat and kept asking myself questions. What do I already have Now that I can create with? My writing ability. Then I started deep cleaning my apartment and came across writings I’ve kept, encouraging letters from teachers and people I have encountered along the journey, and a stack of my journals. I realized that I am an incredible Spirit and that I want to help people see. We have the opportunity to change the world and the ability to free ourselves.
I believe the way that we currently “do work” is not fulfilling to many spiritually. Many of us are not walking in our passions, purposes, and gifts because we do not know who we are. There was a time where knowledge of one’s family and lineage was passed down. The gifts inherited by your line were known and could be fostered and passed down within you. But with many horrific events in humanity’s history, memories were erased, histories were forgotten, and the ways of the wise hidden. But Truth cannot be erased.
Our souls have come to experience this great time in humanity’s history. A time where people are waking up to who they are. Our ancestors knew the Truth. And even in humanity’s darkest hours, Truth has a way of seeping through the crevices and shedding light for those that seek it. African peoples and their descendants had ways of keeping these ancient Truths alive despite their circumstances. Their revolutionary spirits resisted through sound, through their knowledge, through their language, and through their feet.
Our ancestors knew the way of Enlightenment and True Freedom. They vowed to die for it because that was better than being in a world that is spiritually dead. We are disconnected and that was the goal. For us to forget the power within us and seek it in everything outside of us. To become so distracted with the ways of this world that we work hard to remain empty.
2020 was pivotal for me. I vowed to stop playing the game and to move in the direction of my soul’s calling. It has been a journey but one I will never regret. I believe that if I never would have been brave enough to quit my job at the end of 2019, I would have been in a depression so deep that it’s possible that I would have prematurely ended my time here.
I thank God that I chose me.
I intend to keep choosing me every day, no matter how scary it may seem because sacrificing myself for the world– that ain’t it.
You save yourself and change your world by going within– not by being the sacrificial lamb.
I have been keeping myself tied to this current job out of obligation and because I feel like I need to “sacrifice myself” for my students. And out of fear of “needing job security.” I keep going back to what’s safe out of fear and lack of awareness of Self.
That job made me feel like life was getting sucked out of me every single day. My steps felt like weights. I would do everything that I could manually do to put me in high state upon arrival. And slowly as the day progressed my energy and mood would get chipped away, bit by bit. I would remember to come back to the present and enjoy the moment but I was counting down to 4:30 to escape the hell I was WILLINGLY putting myself through.
I had to remember that I can set myself free and that I have the power to do that.
Getting away from the job, getting rest and feeling replenished is the best thing I could do for me. Following the call and doing what makes me happy is the best thing that I could do for anyone.
I am ready to create. I am ready to use my gifts to create a different world. I am ready to show myself and be the fearless Being that I am.
I’ve worked hard to get here. And my prayer is that through me being who I am, I hope that I inspire people to Be the change that the world needs. I pray that you go within. Find what makes you light up and use your gifts and talents to be the change and to be of service. This is our time to step up and make the world what we want it to be. Too long we have waited for something outside of us to be the change we want to see. Giving the power away to something outside of ourselves.
wake up.
Nashema's Blog 